Saturday, December 14, 2013
Don't attempt this at home...
If it wasn't bad enough that Toni and Jim from the CIA were harassing us, now that bitch Linda from Seattle is on my case again in comments. I'm not suggesting that the villagers get the pitchforks and torches and go after her...although the image is appealing...she is still on my Christmas list...for now. Ya know, if she wasn't a great cook, hot, and married to Tom with Megan and Matt...I'd kick her to the curb! I'd unfriend her so fast it would make her Gucci purse return itself! She is always accusing me of not telling the truth, so I upgraded to the Mega-Truth Teller machine...WOW! All that dental work in Bangkok almost popped out...and there was even a bulge in my pants that wasn't gas! That damned machine had brain recognition technology....look what happened...
...don't try this at home...HONEST!!!
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OK, howz about a truce!?!? I'll stop harassing you if you won't call me a bitch anymore. "Fartlady" I can take, even though we both know that's a LIE too!
ReplyDeleteI want to make this perfectly clear...I almost didn't call you a bitch...it wasn't capital letters or anything!...and I haven't called you Fartlady in ages. You, on the other hand, continually call me a liar, and threaten to kill me. I almost kill myself by hooking up to the Mega Truth-Teller, only to get shocking results when brain activity isn't found...that wasn't in the construction manual! Might sue. Anyway, it proves I am the truth teller...so there!
ReplyDeleteDoug, you have way too much fun! xxoo
ReplyDeleteWho is this Doug guy?...he sounds incredibly handsome, well hung, witty, outrageously funny...did I mention handsome? I want to meet him! I'll bet everyone wants to mean HIM!
ReplyDeleteSee see ...we told you that you had the old lie detector hooked up to the wrong head....and you did it again with the Mega-Truth teller...you DORC. It's a good thing that Casstonto needed the campfire lit Kemo Sabe.
ReplyDeleteT&D